Welcome to the 15th edition of North Star Blueprints! In this weekly newsletter, we embark on a journey of personal and professional growth, offering observations, strategies, and inspiration to help you navigate life’s challenges and reach new heights of success. This edition will provide a summary of the daily insights I posted throughout the week, packed with valuable tips, thought-provoking ideas, and actionable advice on how to be you, learning to ask for help, dealing with anxiety, improving emotional awareness, and finding better ways to approach problem solving, in the hopes of helping you to unleash your better self.
May 27: Be you, the world will adjust
In a world that often pressures us to conform and fit into predefined molds, it’s so easy to lose sight of our authentic selves. Yet, our greatest strength lies in embracing who we truly are. When you live authentically, you bring a unique perspective and energy that no one else can replicate.
By staying true to yourself, you attract the right people and opportunities that resonate with your true self. It might not always be easy – sometimes, being yourself means standing out, challenging the status quo, or facing criticism. However, the rewards of living authentically far outweigh these challenges.
When you are genuine, your confidence grows, your relationships become more meaningful, and your life gains a deeper sense of purpose. The world might not always understand or appreciate your uniqueness immediately, but over time, it will adjust. People will respect your integrity and courage, and those who truly matter will support and celebrate your individuality.
Keep in mind, this is not about having a “that’s just how I am, take it or leave it” attitude. it’s still your responsibility to figure out which traits negatively impact your life and those around you, and you need to learn how to fix them. There is always have we can improve about ourselves. It’s about taking a stand for yourself. Embracing your quirks, passions, and values.
The world doesn’t need more copies, it needs originals. Be you, and let the world adjust.
May 28: Asking for help isn’t giving up. It’s refusing to give up
To all the go-getters out there, it’s time to realize that asking for help is not only encouraged but required. It’s easy to think that you can shoulder everything alone, especially as a top performer, you often take pride in the ability to handle multiple tasks, meet deadlines, and maintain high standards, and do it all on your own. Yet, there always comes a point when not asking for help will slow you down.
I’ve observed this happen far too many times: individuals who excel in their fields, but struggle silently under the weight of their own expectations. They pour their energy into every task, determined to deliver nothing short of excellence. However, in their relentless pursuit of perfection, they overlook one crucial element: the power of asking for help.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness – it’s a mark of maturity. It demonstrates an understanding that no one person can do it all alone, and that’s perfectly okay. In fact, it’s necessary for growth and success. By involving others, you not only lighten the load on yourself but also create opportunities for collaboration, innovation, shared success, and a chance for others to learn and grow themselves.
Seeking assistance doesn’t diminish your achievements either, it enhances them. People mostly remember the results we deliver, not so much the struggle behind them. Whether it’s completing a project, solving a problem, or simply managing workload, the end goal remains the same: to deliver high quality outcomes.
Time to shift our perspective. Instead of viewing asking for help as a sign of defeat, see it as a strategic move towards achieving goals more efficiently and effectively. As the famous saying goes, “if you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together”.
May 29: Do not let anxiety be your master
“We suffer more in our imagination than in reality” – Seneca
I saw this quote recently and it got me thinking how often we humans amplify our own suffering by overthinking and projecting our fears. Our minds love to fabricate scenarios, certainly a mechanism that is crucial for our survival… but we also tend to catastrophize, dwell on the past, and focus on highly unlikely future events, often causing unnecessary stress and anxiety.
I learned that the best way to deal with this is to take a step back, detach, and try to observe the situation from the side. Changing my view from first person to third person to gain new a perspective. I find that externalizing our thoughts can help us realize that many of our worries are unfounded or exaggerated – one simple method is to write it all down, answer the worst-case scenario for our “what ifs” on paper, and suddenly they don’t look so complicated anymore, organizing our thoughts and separating rational concerns from irrational fears along the way.
Mark Twain has a fun quote: “I’m an old man and have known many troubles, but most never happened”, don’t let that person be you. Use that as a reminder to live more in the present moment and to not let anxious imagination dictate your life.
May 30: Unlocking emotional awareness
From the moment we are born, our emotions play such a critical role in our lives. We start by expressing basic emotions like joy, anger, and sadness, and as we grow, they become more complex and nuanced, influencing many of our day-to-day activities. Yet, as important as they are, many of us are not particularly good at expressing how we or people around us feel. Being able to better understand this primal mode of communication might be just what you need to elevate your interactions with others professionally and personally.
I recently learnt about the Emotion Wheel – a visual tool that categorizes and organizes human emotions into a circular diagram, displaying primary emotions at the center, with more complex, related emotions branching outwards. It’s a tool that can help you to recognize what you’re feeling and learn how to manage your emotions better in various contexts – becoming more self aware, learning how to regulate your emotions, and getting better at communicating your needs. It also allows you to better read the people around you and what they might be feeling.
Of course, memorizing the wheel shouldn’t be the goal. It’s simply meant to be something you look at, acknowledge its existence, and use a guide when needed to articulate yourself. Being able to put emotions into words is powerful – it allows you to label and detach from them, giving you the chance to take back control over yourself.
Give it a try, it’s truly fascinating the kind of insights you can gain by simply learning to assign a name to what you’re feeling.
May 31: Focus on solutions, not problems
A company received a complaint that their consumer had bought a soapbox that was empty. Looks like some soaps weren’t package properly on the assembly line, resulting in empty boxes.
The solution? An X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two employees to watch all the soapboxes as they pass through the line to make sure they are not empty. This certainly fixes the problem… but at what cost?
A simpler solution? turn on a fan directed at the assembly line, and as each soapbox passes by, the empty ones will blow off because they are so light. No more empty soapboxes, a lot of happy customers.
The difference? the first method is obsessed with catching empty boxes that it overengineered a solution. The second method simply found a way to ensure customers don’t get empty boxes. The problem was not finding the empty boxes, but rather ensuring they don’t end up with customers. Whatever challenge you’re trying to solve in your own line of work, make sure you focus on the solution you need, not the problem you have.
While acknowledging obstacles is the first step towards a resolution, dwelling on them can drain your resources and stall progress. Instead, write down what the outcome needs to be and work backwards from there, as opposed to starting from the problem and working towards an outcome. Otherwise, just like the problem above, you will get so absorbed in the problem that you’ll forget what you’re even solving for.
Remember, it’s more about focusing on the HOW and WHY (solution focused) you’re solving something, instead of the WHAT (problem focused).
Thank you for joining me on this journey of growth and discovery. I hope these insights illuminate your path forward as you pursue your aspirations with purpose and determination. See you in next week’s edition!
